June 19, 2008 10:51 pm
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Got a problem you'd like to share with Sidney? Write to her at: The Meridian Star, P.O. Box 1591, Meridian, MS 39301 or e-mail her at sidneycovington@comcast.net. All submissions are confidential and go directly to Sidney.
Dear Sidney:
I have a situation. My daughter is 9 years old and me and her dad have not been together since she was 2 years old. He paid minimal support for about a year and half only on occasions and owes me $15,000 in back support and keeps adding up every month. He stopped seeing her when she was 4 years old. He doesn’t hold a job and is always in and out of jail even as we speak. He has not even called or seen her in five years.
My question is, I have been with my husband since she was 2 years old and he has taken the dad role and financial responsibility for her. She is well taken care of and now calls him dad. If something were to happen to me what can I do now so she can stay with the man who is raising her? You might say terminate the rights, but if i can't find him to do that, is there any other way — like is a will good enough? Thank you for your time.
A young Mom
Dear Mom,
Sounds like there's a mighty blessed 9-year-old little girl — blessed to have a mom who is married to a man who has unselfishly taken her on as his own.
I can fully understand your concern about your child's well-being should you not be able to finish raising her. Let me state first and foremost that I am NOT a lawyer and don't pretend to be. But, I have friends who are!
To terminate parental rights (TPR), I am told that all you have to do is show that the child's natural father has not had any contact with her for a year, and since you say it's been over five years, you're pretty much '"home free." You'll want to get an attorney to possibly help you file an affidavit stating that you don't know where the father's whereabouts are (if you don't) although that's not essential to TPR.
There are other ways to terminate parental rights but this way is the easiest. And, since I'm assuming your "new" husband is willing to adopt her, this shouldn't be too difficult or expensive. Again, consult an attorney before doing anything.
I wish you well and may God continue to bless your family!
Love, Sidney
• Sidney Covington has a master's degree in counseling. She is a patient advocate and public relations
representative for Riley Hospital.
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